Words you can borrow
What to say to others
You do not owe anyone the story. These are sentences other people have used. Change them until they sound like you.
A friend asks how you are
“Not great, honestly. I don't want to get into it, but I'd love to sit together.”
Someone asks when you are due
“I'm not pregnant right now.” You can stop there. You do not have to explain.
Someone asks whether you will try again
“We're taking it one day at a time. Thank you for caring.”
Your manager or coworkers
“I've had a loss, and I may need some time. I'd like to share only that, for now.”
A baby shower invitation
“I'm so happy for you. I can't be there, but I'm thinking of you.” You do not owe a reason.
Someone says “at least...”
“I know you mean well. It's still a loss for me.” Or change the subject.
A few notes
Saying less is allowed
You can tell different people different amounts. You can tell someone once and ask them to pass it along, so you do not have to say it again.
If a conversation leaves you shaken, it is fine to leave it. A short text to Yolanda before a hard dinner is also fine; she can use the next session to go through it.
Want to practice these with someone?
A session is a good place to try the words out loud before the dinner.